23 December 2009

With Love, Terrorist.



To the cruel-mean people of the Indian Cinema,

~Why are terrorists or revolutionists always portrayed angry and stupid? Could the real guys sue the movie makers for it?
I mean, he could finish off the hero the first time he sees him (A head shot would be nice!) rather than letting him go and consequently getting killed by him later, after a most probable hostage situation.

~Why is he still a terrorist, if he cant handle firearms properly? He doesnt even shoot at our hero correctly for 'once' and even if he does, why the shoulder always?
Seriously what happened to the Kalashnikovs, the AK 47s or the C4s that he should have been well equipped with, rather than the shitty weapons he is forced to use while our hero is the one handling a Dragunov Sniper!

~And what is it with the mono-numerology? Why is it always a Wasim or Abdullah or some ***llah? It could as well be a James or a Yung Mang Chang or a Vishnu Gowthem or even a Koundamani. Terrorists should be allowed to have cool names!

~Why does every terrorist sport a long beard and a very sharp nose?
Its as if the Japanese and the other blunt nosed people are incapable of terrorizing acts!
And again Tamil directors! With the konjam-konjam Tamil he speaks, he brainwashes young minds? Not buying it!

~He shouldn't be portrayed psychotic by killing one of his own men. We would like him to do that to enemies instead.

~Also any terrorist should be given his space in the movie, say a possible if-not-foreign country, atleast-ullooor duet with his loved one.

Yours Sincerely,
The Mookan from the Vijayakanth/Arjun Movies.

17 December 2009

Love is Blind

First of all this is a true story, but it doesn't mean any person in particular.
And that means especially you Enfy.
Bitch.

This is a simple story of LOVE in its most purest form.

I was in my sophomore year of college. She lived in another part of the same town that I lived in, but was safely protected from the cruel and mean outer world.
I was talkative/chatty but I would like to be referred friendly. :) She was pretty quiet apart from the rare whispers, that I liked her instantly for. But she can scream out loud enough to melt the cerumen in my ear if she wanted to.
My favorite color was black and so was hers although she wore yellow colored garbs more often. (But whenever she was with me, she stuck to black.)
She was good-looking, glossy, hygienic, sexy and smart. She was in all ways, The perfect one for me.

One fine evening, as the crimson sun ruled the sky, I met her for the first time in my life. My friend introduced her to me and like any cliched tamil movie, I instantly fell for her. Yes people, It was LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT! And unlike cliched tamil movies, she instantly fell for me too.

Till date, I dont know why I did it but I confessed my feelings for her, to me mum and dad. Although they expressed a few regrets, eventually they understood, for our love was unadulterated. They agreed, everything went well and soon we became inseparable. She was very understanding, quick to do things and always was a big part of my happiness. She stuck with me no matter how bad i was. I on the other hand, was ALL OVER HER. I was insane, my friends might say. I DROVE HER CRAZY and she made me drive her crazy too. She responded sweetly to my every single touch. She nodded her head whenever I touched her neck. I look at her as she smile brightly like colored lights whenever the young night came upon. And the good times rolled. :)

I took her everywhere i went. Even while meeting my friends. We went to theaters, restaurants, temples, cricket grounds and pretty much everywhere Madurai offered us. One dark night, we were travelling all alone. Me and her. It was raining and my view was blinded. A car came zooming out of nowhere and we were hit. I escaped with a wolverine like cut in my hand, but she was bruised, which ended up as a big white scar. Yet, she never complained. She still gleamed at me proudly with her scar and smiled pleasantly as ever. To put it simply, I was happy with her and she was all whom I ever needed in this world.
LIFE was too good for us. :)

And after a year and half of our relationship, I was brought back to earth, rather I was thara thara nu iluthified back to earth, as tragedy struck and she was taken away forcefully from me. I just hope she wasn't hurt. :(
For love her always, I will.

Dedicated to my BATMOBILE (Apache RTR 160) that was stolen.

To all the lovely times u tried to kill me,
And the very few occasional moments u almost succeded.
To all the places you showed me,
And the very few you dint make it.
To all the noise pollution we caused together,
And the neighbors that woke up to it.

To the valet parking that you never got,
And the theater parking that you did get.
To the Angelina (Jolie) ride that you would have given me,
And all the British Bakery chicken sandwich we went and got.
To the gallons of petrol you had,
And the imperial gallons of Pepsi I had.

To all the blissful journey we shared,
And the brutal accidents we bear ed,
The precious time you saved me,
And the quick pace you gave me,
May your engine rust in peace.

Amen.